For Everyone Who’s Been Through Bad Times

It doesn’t matter if you are 12, or if you are 34. Heartbreak happens whenever. Don’t listen to them when they tell you that you’re too young to know about love, or pain, because you know something right now and that ‘something’ would be your everything if you were to die tomorrow. I’ve seen 50 year old people getting their chests ripped open and their hearts squished to pulp and so they would never consider your agony painful enough, but it is. It’s sad that people measure pain. It’s sad that humans have to assign quantities to abstractness, but what’s happy without sad?

The point is, what you feel right now is absolute destruction. Infinite emptiness. You don’t want to do anything, or meet anyone. You’re hungry but you don’t want to eat. It’s one of the hardest days for your body because it’s trying its best to keep you alive. Your heart, even though it’s ripped to shreds and residing at the pit of your stomach, is trying to pump blood through every vein you’ve tried to cut. Your lungs, the ones that are now dyed black from the smoke of every cigarette you’ve ever lit, are still struggling to make you breathe between your muffled sobs.

What does this tell you?

You might not believe it, but your body knows when it’s time for the full stop. That’s why some people survive the most fatal of diseases, and some people die of the most harmless of reasons. If it’s supposed to continue, the body will accept the help of a tiny pill, and if it’s not, it will reject a bypass surgery. That’s why miracles happen, because our bodies don’t give up until they’re supposed to.

I’ll be honest, life gets worse. I felt terrorizing pain when I was 12, and I got over it. Now I’m 16, and I feel way worse. I feel numb. But I’m glad I didn’t give up when I was 12, because that pain was not worth it. And I know this pain that I feel now, isn’t worth it either.

Your greatest fears of today, will be your ‘better times’ tomorrow, I promise you.

Life can only get worse once it gets better, and trust me, the worst can’t ever be worth death, but the slightest better is always going to be worth life.

You’re still alive, if you’re reading this. And that means it’s not the end. And it’s not going to be the end until it’s the end. I won’t tell you to be happy, because I struggle with it just as much, but I know that you will be. One day.

And that day, you will not regret it – you will no longer regret life.

Wishes Come True

I wished upon a star

to make me beautiful,

but I woke up in the morning

looking just the way I do.

I put myself together, wondering if wishes ever come true.

That morning, I smiled

at every stranger I saw

and of the things I got back

smiles weren’t all.

I grinned at the world; it looked back at me with awe.

That afternoon, I danced

in the middle of the street

and fell down, just so the man in the wheelchair

wouldn’t feel as weak.

I never felt happier before, while scraping my knees.

That night, I didn’t drink

and not a single cigarette

did I light up, for I was too drunk,

too high on happiness.

And for the first time in years, I slept without regret.

My wish had come true, for my soul had become pretty,

and that day I realized, mirrors are far too lifeless to recognize beauty.

The Transgender

His soul had darkened over the ages, so much so, it was now black. Pitch black.

And then he found her. She gathered all his thoughts, brought all his emotions to the surface, and brushed the dust off his long forgotten memories. She then took this stardust and fathomed it into a nebula. Constantly stirring all pieces of his life together, she gave birth to a tiny ball of light. She kept creating stars until there was an entire galaxy rushing down his spine. Parallel universes coursed through his veins and his wounds now oozed the brilliance of infinite light.

He found her in himself and glimmering, he walked out of the closet.

Courts and Theatres

 

She failed to understand the buzz about Batman vs. Superman, for she had grown up watching her two favorite heroes fight each other every single morning.

She failed to understand the disappointment about its ending, for the one she had witnessed in court was way more devastating than the one in theatres.